Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize