so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
