That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
