New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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