dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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