Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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