I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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