just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Randomize