did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize