piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
"it" just moved
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
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