did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
