Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
