question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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