i was rollin on her like bob the builder
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Can I color on your dick again?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
