3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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