i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
