She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
3pm strippers are depressing
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
