So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
