I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Can I color on your dick again?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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