My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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