grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
