she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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