I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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