so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I love you. Go after that dick
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
