I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
