im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
