god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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