stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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