Is it because I queefed?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
