We're like a lot better than the average bears
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize