i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
