Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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