Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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