ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
