I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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