Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
