Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
