ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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