hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Four minutes until I can fart!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
