sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
