Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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