apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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