Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
