Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
ttyl tear gas
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
