yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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