I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Mom said you looked used
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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