New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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