first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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