last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
