Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
